It's rare for me to make two posts in the same week let alone the same day, but such glaring and stunning stupidity cannot go unreported.As anyone who has spoken with me in the last few months is well aware, my job hunt has been less than fruitful. I've received three rejection emails and one phone interview that led to another rejection email. While I appreciate the feedback, these are not the results I was hoping for. I couldn't figure out the reason, but I do believe I'm stumbled across something that might begin to explain my less-than-stellar success.
I've sent out 28 job applications so far. Way back when I sent out the first one, I spent a considerable amount of time making sure that my initial cover letter and resume were in excellent shape. My mom was of considerable help. WVU's so-called "career center" less so. In any case, I thought I had my cover letter in very reasonable shape when I sent out my first job application; therefore, when drafting new cover letters for new jobs, I was using that first letter as a template and altering the information accordingly.
This is how all 28 cover letters begin:
"I was delighted see the job posting on [wherever I saw it] for a [whatever the job is], and I believe that I would be an excellent fit for this position."
It looks fairly nice until you realize that I left out two little letters that actually help to form a complete sentence: TO! The first part should read, "I was delighted TO see the job posting..." I went back and checked all the old cover letters, and much to my horror, I discovered that this typo survived into every.... single.... one! Now some of you might think that this isn't such a big deal. After all, it's just an innocent typo. Except that I'm applying for WRITING positions. In some cases, I've even applied to be a goddamn proofreader!! My cover letter and resume go on to explain how impeccable my grammatical and writing skills are. Fucking incompetent!!!
It kills me that this mistake just wafted through so many revisions. I've screwed up a few individual cover letters. For instance, I recently applied for a position at a Registrar's Office in Washington PA, but after I sent off my application, I realized that I spelled it "Registar's Office" all through the damn cover letter. Fortunately, the position was filled already, so my ridiculous mistake didn't matter.
But that was just one gaffe. I don't know how to explain this other one; and it's the first damn line too! I wonder how many HR people saw that first line and assumed me to be an idiot. I guess my mind just filled in the word "to" without really registering that this priceless little conjunction wasn't there.
At least I can rest peacefully knowing that these 28 companies aren't undervaluing me. They have a very accurate understanding of my writing skills.
I guess I just needed see that.
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I am to stupid too get a job.
10 comments:
Aw, JP. I feel for you. I think my heart would have stopped at that moment. Now, what's my excuse for not getting a job? :)
-LD
aah! That is sad. I think Heather Mercer made a bad typo in the first line of a cover letter for a proofreading job too--perhaps everyone does that? Maybe just the word proofreading (or writing skills)connected with possible remuneration freaks everyone out until they cannot write at all. I have learned now--when I send out applications, coerce my mother, sister, brother, 3 friends, and at least 4 cats to read them first.
How did you end up catching the mistake, were you trying to revise the cover letter to say something else?
LD: I began shouting "FUCK!" at increasingly angry levels as I opened one document after another.
You're probably just having some bad luck. You can't win against someone who's got an inside advantage.
SB: Yes, the proofreading jobs were the worst kind of stupid. "I am a very detail-oriented person who pays attention to grammar." Apparently not. :)
Anon: I somehow just saw it on the most recent cover letter I was writing. I thought for a minute that I must have taken it out just on that one without realizing it. My stomach flipped over when I realized that the mistake must have been present the whole time.
You could turn this into an opportunity to show your sense of humor... make the corrections to the original with your own pithy comments in red as if you were already the proof-reader and resubmit. You never know who might appreciate the irony of it enough to bring you in for an interview.
... "to stupid too" ...
typo or intentional?
or proper english, i don't know, its not my strong point
Intentional, sir.
Grammatical irony if you will. :)
Aw! I'm sorry that happened. It's probably what didn't get you a callback, though. People look for any little thing to weed out when they have a big pool of candidates to select from.
Try going to your local paper. They'll probably be happy to see somebody who will give them a glint of credibility. After all, my hometown rag is largely written by my brain damaged cousin. Literally. If he can do it, you can, too.
Some part of me is pleased about this mistake, because I can blame the typo for not getting any interviews. I can choose to believe that it's not a personal flaw, and that by making the changes, I can improve my chances.
On the other hand, it's also 28 resumes down the shitter. I used to be able to wake up every morning with the thought that MAYBE today I'd get a call. Such hope is gone.
I told your story to a couple of my classes to illustrate the necessity of carefully reading their work before they submit it. They were actually quiet for most of the story, so I liked that I piqued their curiosity. After I was finished, one of them asked me where on the Internet I found the story. Don't worry--I didn't direct a bunch of 9th and 10th graders to your blog, but I was offended that he didn't think I was being genuine!
-LD
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