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Would somebody please explain the economic stimulus debate to me in 500 words or less?
As my befuddled economically-challenged brain understands it, the premise behind the stimulus bill makes sense. During times of high unemployment, people don't spend anything because they want to hoard what they have. This is not good for the economy because people have to spend money in order to make the economy go. With people saving their money because they think they're going to die, the economy starts to go down the shitter even further resulting in even higher unemployment. In order to alleviate these concerns, the government is going to spend a shitload of money at once to kind of jump-start the economy so that it doesn't stagnate.
If a gold star is warranted for being somewhere in the ball park on this summary, I'd appreciate being given that little reward. If I'm way off base, I'll take a very sensual spanking.
More conservative advocates want the government stimulus to instead come in the form of tax breaks for individuals. I do not understand this plan. Wouldn't the amount that each person receives be relatively small? Given such a small tax break, doesn't it seem more likely that individual taxpayers will simply put that money into savings (given the dire economic situation) instead of spending it? All that people hear right now is that they need to SAVE SAVE SAVE their money! If they get a tax break, isn't that exactly what they'll do?
I really enjoy telling people that I think they're stupid even when I don't understand their argument (makes me feel good about myself), but in this case I'm not going to do that. I truly don't believe that those people who support the tax breaks are incompetent, so I want to know what the reasoning is behind that notion. I'm looking to you, brave and discerning FoxNews viewers. What's the reasoning behind the conservative plan?
I rather like the people on TV who claim that a depression is necessary and that we shouldn't do anything. First, apathy comes naturally to me, so I'm totally on board. Second, the vast majority of people don't want to listen to these negative Nancies, so I root for the underdog. And third, there's a certain poetry to two decades of prosperity being rewarded with a giant economic comeuppance. With my twenty years spent in school receiving excellent grades and being told that I'd be going places in my life and then languishing in unemployment forever, I see my life as a microcosm for American society as a whole. Misery loves company.
So let's play a little game we're going to call: EDUCATE THE ECONOMIC SIMPLETON. The winner will get to have Carl Kasell record the greeting on his or her home answering machine.
(If you get that obscure reference, you're probably an economically-challenged humanities major like me.)
My brain is like an open vessel awaiting your soluble and quenching truth.
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The Economy: Once you understand it, you've probably overdosed on LSD.