God Less America

America has spoken! God is dead! Now we can all graciously apologize to Nietzsche.

The Associated Press recently released a report of a study conducted by Trinity College that indicates that Americans are becoming less religious. According to the article:

The percentage of Christians in the nation has declined and more people say they have no religion at all. Fifteen percent of respondents said they had no religion, an increase from 14.2 percent in 2001 and 8.2 percent in 1990, according to the American Religious Identification Survey.

I must admit that I didn't think the percentage of admitted non-religious Americans was so high. I didn't even know about the 2001 14.2% figure. I've always suspected that a vast number of Americans are secretly non-believers and only go to church for social, familial, traditional, or habitual reasons. I never thought that as many as 15% would actually admit to being atheists!

If fifteen percent sounds like a low figure to you, just remember that that number describes people who don't have any religious beliefs. According to the survey:

"About 12 percent of Americans believe in a higher power but not the personal God at the core of monotheistic faiths."

These people could believe in anything from a mysterious energy being from the fifth dimension to the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Another 3.5% of respondents describe themselves as "non-denominational Christians." The AP says:

"Congregations that most often use the term are megachurches considered 'seeker-sensitive.' They use rock music and less structured prayer to attract people who don't usually attend church."

Any group that listens to "Enter Sandman" while worshiping in a "megachurch" does not qualify as a religion. Such is the way of things.

On a more general level, the study found that organized religion is playing less of a role in the daily lives of Americans.

"Thirty percent of married couples did not have a religious wedding ceremony and 27 percent of respondents said they did not want a religious funeral."

This pleases me. I don't want a religious wedding or funeral, and now it looks like a sizable portion of the population agrees with me. Why should God have any part in my wedding? No religion really teaches of a Mrs. God, so I'm not inclined to take marital advice and blessings from a guy who's never had his own old lady at home. As for funerals, I don't need some guy in a pointy hat giving hollow platitudes to my loved ones about me being in a better place. Bullshit! If religious folk thought that dying would send them to a better place, they'd go out of their way to ensure their own deaths. Why aren't Christians out there driving without seatbelts, sniffing in toxic gases, and drinking lighter fluid? And if there are people at my funeral who are religious, they certainly won't believe that my sacreligious ass went to a "better place."

The only religion that seems to be doing well right now is Catholicism. But don't celebrate just yet, dear Catholic readers. The reason the Catholics' numbers are so high is because of Mexican immigrants. Mexicans are overwhelmingly Catholic, and they're bringing their Pope-love with them to the States, so some conservative Catholics better alter their stance on Mexican immigration if they want to keep their numbers high.

It's nice to know that atheists are more numerous than I thought. While in Morgantown a few weeks ago, I lamented to Virgil that in a hundred years, Mormonism would probably be as mainstream as Catholicism or Protestantism. She smiled and retorted, "I'm hoping that religion will be completely gone in a hundred years." I rolled my eyes and sort of guffawed at the notion. But maybe she's not completely out of the ball park. The percentage of admitted atheists in this country has nearly doubled in 20 years. Who knows what a century will bring.

For now, I can at least have an even MORE pompous and arrogant tone when discussing religious matters with my friends. They can then scoff at the hypocrite who gets all of his money by working for a pastor while he's condemning religion on the internet.

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Atheist numbers are growing. Thank God!