Now THAT'S what I'm talking about!Well yesterday was certainly a disappointment. The local news stations promised that there's be a huge, dangerous, monstrous storm coming through Morgantown around 5pm yesterday. I was all set to kiss my ass goodbye as I watched the wanton destruction and possible bodily harm around me. It was the most excitement that had been promised to that area since they introduced the telephone ten years ago.
And then the storm came, and it was your everyday non-fatal thunderstorm. YAWN! Where's the tornado? Where's the blown-out circuit breakers and deadly flash floods? I was hoping for a little fun and excitement. Instead I was simply wet and disappointed - like most women who go to bed with me.
Pittsburgh certainly got owned, and the local news stations loved it. From what I can tell, the entire suburb of Millvale must have been totally wiped out because the townsfolk were bawling - which is like music to a newscaster's ears. They kept showing footage of people crying over their flooded homes and people angry about the city not doing something to prevent this (A GIANT DOME OVER THE CITY I SAY!).
Interspersed with their tales of misery and destruction were the weather reports. About fifteen minutes before the promised arrival of the storm in Morgantown, I saw the radar screen for channel four news. Heading straight for Morgantown was a huge blob of red and purple with little swirly things in the middle of it (tornadoes I presume). Huzzah! This was going to be interesting. Nothing spices up a lazy summer afternoon like seeing a neighbor impaled with a rake. I would have even settled for a mudslide or a flash flood. Then the storm comes, and everything's fine. The power didn't even flicker, which is amazing given that the power in my apartment complex will go out if a squirrel farts near a transformer box.
Alas, whatever that purple blob was, it didn't come into Morgantown. I guess we'll have to wait for Prince to come to town before we can get the purple rain.
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Severe Thunderstorms - Providing entertainment for soulless bastards since 1983.
2 comments:
Boy, you are bored, aren't you! LOL. You just weren't in the right part of the county for the storm. On the east side, it washed out some roads, took down trees, oh, and lightening fried our nonprofit computers. We're still putting everything back together!
That was a different storm. You told me about that one in class on Thursday. This one was about two hours after Thursday's class.
Still, it's a good thing you don't believe in God, because otherwise you might want to consider that he's out to get you.
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