Please Use Back Door

Being an English grad student has led to such apathy on my part that I just can't stand to be in class anymore, but this semester has at least provided entertainment value in the form of a class called "Romanticism, Sexuality, and the Law."

Today's lesson: Sodomy and pederasty.

The professor, as you might imagine, is odd. He flails his arms and bobs his head around as he talks. He's weird looking too.
Does this look like a man that you'd want to discuss anal sex with? Of course, we didn't call it anal sex. My favorite phrase of the evening had to be "sodomitical transaction;" however, "spermatic economy" was a close runner-up. The class seemed like an exercise in who could come up with the most obscure euphemism. Given the topic of the class, why couldn't we just use everyday language? No one is confused when I say "The cheese-monger had his cock buried in the ass of the Duke of Gloucester." The professor was pulling terms out of his ass (*pun intended*).

The point of the class is apparently to discuss how people in the Romantic Era in England (early 19th century or so) dealt with issues such as sodomy, rape, and pederasty. I don't have the vaguest idea of how this will relate to literature. There are legitimate books on our syllabus, but I'm almost afraid to know about the personal life Percy Shelley now that I know what the class is about.

The professor is oddly excited by depraved sexuality. The more bizarre the sex, the more jovial he became while discussing it. You should have seen him rub his hands in glee as he talked about the upcoming section on rape. You might be tempted to assume that the professor's gay, but I'm not so sure. I think being confined to a single orientation would be constricting for this guy. Batmite thinks he's pan-sexual. If you can dream it up, this guy would probably be willing to entertain the idea.

I don't think I'm really mature enough for this class. It's taking every ounce of self-control for me not to giggle like a six-year-old during class discussions. In one presentation, a person mentioned a book called A Gay History of Britain. The author of said book was H. G. Cocks. I'm not even making that up. H. G. Cocks wrote A Gay History of Britain.

After class, I came back to the apartment and ate some hot sausages. Then my head hurt from the Freudian implications of class and dinner. I somehow suspect that this class will only get weirder, so be prepared for further updates regarding this class. After all, we haven't even gotten to the Prostitution and Rape sections yet.

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Buggery: It doesn't mean what you think. Go ahead and look it up.